Following on from my Femme / Feminine Lesbian Invisibility and after a discussion with my partner’s aunt, I have wondered a few things –
– do I just give off a ‘I’m taken and happy vibe’ that both women (gay, bi and straight women) andstraight men pick up on
– and consequently I don’t give off a ‘I’m single and available’ vibe that some people would pick up on
– does my body language says the above
Maybe it is a combination of all of the above and being presumed as straight. Perhaps I should run a little experiment where next time I head to a women only event, I wear a pin-up girl t-shirt or something rainbow to say – ‘I like the ladies!’
A Saturday night a few weeks ago some of my boylesque/drag king classmates performed at our local lesbian night club. It was a Rocky Horror Picture Show themed night and a red a black outfit of corset, fishnets and high heels was obligatory to arrive in (costume change came later). I got the occasional glance and look up and down, but no one approached me for a chat or my phone number. My intent was not to be chatted up. I am happy in my relationship and I’m not seeking other partners. But it is a nice feeling when a fellow woman (i.e. fellow lesbian) finds you attractive and you don’t have to indicate that you too are a lady loving woman. It is something I have wanted since coming out ten years ago.
Do I give off a particular vibe? Unavailable? Unapproachable? Straight? Bi-curious? Do other lesbians see me as straight? Do I, though my feminine and glamorous style and long hair, pass as straight? Is this a case of femme/feminine lesbian invisibility?
Do we need to do more for femme visibility? I think in the lesbian press and online there is definitely representation of femme/feminine looking lesbians, but do we need to change our own internal perceptions and the lesbian community’s perceptions around ‘what lesbians look like?’ Is there a certain presumption that lesbian women should be inherently ‘dykey’ or alternative in appearance? Do we need to address our own ways of spotting other lesbians? And……. perhaps our own internal doubts and les-phobia around ‘I don’t look gay’ Food for thought….
Image courtesy of Curve Magazine
Image courtesy of Curve Magazine
Over the weekend I reached the wonderfully inspiring (well for me anyway) milestone of 5,100 views of my blog!! Simply knowing that my blog with a minuscule following has reached that many views is encouraging. I have been very quiet on this blog for a while, but have been blogging a fair bit on my Sapphicscientist’s blog. In 2015 I am planning (cracking that imaginary whip) to blog more and do it regularly. And with more regular post I might get a fee more views?!
I have been extremely inactive on my blog since October last year. Writing for an online Feminist magazine, making my first forays into learning and performing burlesque, and finally studying science communication at university took my away from my blogs. I’m a bad blogger.
Having been set a blogging assignment as part of my sci com studies has inspired me to write a post after so many inactive months. We have to create a blog and post regularly on a controversial science topic or issue. I have my thinking cap on and have started reading blogs again (I have been rather slack in this department too). Perhaps I will share my newly minted blog here, if permitted. This assignment has got me excited and inspired again!
I just read a very interesting article by Tom Welton, a Professor of Sustainable Chemistry at Imperial College London, in the Guardian – Gay Prejudice? It’s not easy admitting you’re a scientist. Certainly raises a few points around LGBT scientists coming out to the LGBT community and seeming disinterest in science within that community. Out LGBT scientists are just as important role models as out LGBT sports people, musicians, artists and activists. LGBT youth interested in science need to see that there are people like them that have chosen careers in science.